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(alternate review of Simpson's Safari)
One of the last remaining
things to be surprised about in a Simpsons episode is trying to figure out how
they will get from the wacky opening to the main story, since nine times out of
ten these days the two will be as completely unrelated as an NCAA basketball game
and a man who wears a bunch of cages around his clothes to protect himself from
three inch bees (and yes, that's a reference to a current Conan O'Brien skit;
you gotta take the laughs where you can find 'em).
So anyway the Simps go
shopping at "CostMo," which is a kind of upmarket CostCo, since all
Homer does as soon as he arrives is start complaining about the prices and the
vast cornucopia of rare and tropical eats: "Olive oil? Asparagus? If your
mother wasn't so extravagant we could shop at the gas station like normal people!"
he intones. You know, it's funny because it's true.
Anyway somehow Homer gets into a fight with the grocery bag boys of Sack Stuffers Local 199 while Maggie eats a magazine and ends up in the emergency room. Since the strike is getting really ugly (even Lenny's hat is a victim), Homer soon finds himself up in the attic, scrounging for a rare treat -- a box of old animal crackers. "Homer no, those were made in the 1960s." "Mmm, turbulent."
So this is our bridge -- Homer's cookie box made a "promise of a vacational nature" and so wins a free vacation to Africa; we, the lucky viewer, also win a ride, though in this case, we may have been better off hanging around with the bag boys of Sack Stuffers Local 199.
When the second act
begins, the Simps are flying to Africa. They find out it's not too stable there,
wherever they are (I don't think it was made explicit, but I think it was supposed
to be Kenya -- the Ngorengore park they mentioned is real), as the country is
ruled by a Dictator Muntutu, poachers are running all over the place shooting
at people, and the bed bugs don't bite, they paralyze. I'm going to have to compare
this one too "Lisa the Tree-Hugger," another environmentally-themed
episode this season that managed to treat its environmental themes (tree-saving)
a lot more respectfully than did this.
Smile and say, "Hungry,
Hungry Hippo!" all season long!
Not to go off on a rant here, but the particular part of the world they're in is pretty messed up -- lots of banditry, starvation, disease, ethnic warfare, and native wildlife getting hunted and bulldozed into extinction -- none of which makes a very good backdrop for comedy, I'm afraid. It's just in poor taste, and even Lisa, who's supposed to be the conscience of the show, seems to have no clue as to what she is talking about.
Things start off pretty well in the third act, as the Simps float down river, hopelessly lost and about to die, tumbling over Victoria Falls, only to be rescued in the wilderness by an intelligent chip. "Maybe he'll lead us to bananas," says one of the starving kids. "Or more mouth-watering monkeys!" says Homer, in the best line of the night.
Instead the monkey takes them to Doctor Jane Goodall, who Homer believes is the most boring woman in Earth. At this point the plot completely breaks down, Greenpeace shows up, as do the poachers, the dictator, monkeys mining diamonds ... all kinds of damn things, actually, none of which made much sense. It was pretty much downhill from there.
A
somewhat muddled, poorly-resolved episode salvaged mostly by its one-liners and
occasional incongruously funny odd bits, but certainly not an episode with any
kind of story or plot you'd care to remember.
On the safari, Marge points out an incredible zoological parade, shouting, "Look everybody." Staring at the odometer, Homer wonders, "Wow. It just rolled over to ten thousand." Later, Kitenge scares off some poachers. However, he points out, "They'll be back. They left their cargo pants." Then, Kitenge shows the family the bones of the oldest man. Homer pooh-poohs, "I've got more bones than that guy. If you're trying to impress me, you've failed."
At a Masai dance, the Simpson family boogies down. Marge says, "This song has been going on for hours." Homer responds, "Yeah, it's like the Allman brothers."
After enraging a hippo, the Simpsons take flight down a river. "Don't worry. Being eaten by a crocodile is just like going to sleep . . . in a giant blender." After plummeting down Victoria Falls, the family eventually finds a monkey guide. Bart suggests, "Hey, maybe he'll lead us to bananas." Homer counters, "Or more mouth-watering monkeys." The monkey leads the family to Bushwell's Chimp Refuge. Marge says, "Oh, isn't that sweet. He named it after his wife." Lisa explains, "No, Doctor Bushwell is a woman." Marge exclaims, "Well, now I've heard everything."
Poachers beset the refuge and demand the chimps. The Simpson family defends Bushwell. Then, it is revealed that the poachers are really eco-activists who want to free the chimps that are being exploited in Bushwell's diamond mine. Back at Bushwell's diamond-filled cabin, Marge marvels, "Even on the soles of her shoes." One of the Green Peace activists states, "She's one of the ten richest chimp researchers in the world."
Rolling on a bed of diamonds, Homer shouts, "Look at me! I'm a scientist." Not wanting to unfairly condemn Dr. Bushwell, the family looks at her notes. It turns out that her research consists of pictures of monkeys from movies. Bushwell bribes the Simpson family with diamonds. As their plane takes off, Homer notes a billboard that shows Kitenge has become president while Munto is the new flight attendant.
The
episode closes with, "Dedicated to the hardworking bag boys of America …whose
ineptness and greed were the inspiration for the episode."
